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My hair

Erica and I went to Sephora (yes I've been hanging out with Erica and I don't want to hear about it...) and I bought this very awesome piece of hair. It's like hair attached to a headband attached to a comb and goes on the underside of your head - so it's like having long, straight, black hair. Since my actual hair is short-ish and black-ish and I straighten it, it looks like it belongs on my head and it's pretty hot looking :P

My lack of degree

So last week B went to ACCC to meet with an advisor to see how well his credits from Rutgers will transfer there (they transfer fine, those schools are friends I guess) and has pretty much decided he's going to finish his associate's there in the fall and then continue on after that wherever he can. So, good for him.

I tried to figure out if there's a way I can scrape an associate's degree out of all my college credits - well, there's not. I think I'll be diploma-less forever, at this point.

My possibly unwise move

Um, I got Erica a job at my restaurant. Her parents pretty much told her they're happy to have her home but she can't just keep living there and not have a job, so... yeah. I thought it was a good idea at the time but most of my co-workers there know her (or know of her) and are kind of wary of her. I hope things work out. I think they will, but I hope there isn't some major reason why they won't that I'm overlooking.

My plans for this week

I have a long list of doctors to see this week, mostly in Philly. I've had a piss-poor time of finding doctors here in NJ because I live so far from any kind of major city that I might as well just go back to Philly because at least there I'm already a patient and my records are there, etc. The one appointment has been pushed back three different times and I'm getting really annoyed - it's been pretty much a constant push pull with me and doctors ever since I've been, you know, making my own decisions instead of letting my mom set everything up for me. I get scolded like a child for not coming in often enough, and yet it's nearly impossible to get and actually keep an appointment. Catch-22 much?

Huh.

Mar. 18th, 2009 12:22 am
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You know, I have no problem admitting it: yes, you're right, I am making a lot of posts/starting a lot of posts with "my boyfriend..."

Hey, I get a kick out of saying it, okay? I've never had a boyfriend before and never even contemplated the possibility. I'm sure if I had a girlfriend (assuming we weren't constantly on the outs) I'd post a lot about her too, but yes, I do realize how often I use the phrase "my boyfriend." GIMME A BREAK.

So anyway. About MY BOYFRIEND and my hair products and his hair in general: I've said several times that I don't like his hair. He does not particularly like mine either and has also made this known, but whatever, my hair is awesome. He slicks his, well, not back, just down, and pretty much all the time. Yeah, I've seen it not slicked down like that, like, in the mornings and stuff, and over the summer last year sometimes I'd see him after he'd been in the water or something. I get why he does that with it: with his hair just doing whatever, he looks really young. Like, really, really young, like, if he said he was sixteen, I'd believe him and so would anyone else. It's cute, but kind of disturbing at the same time, and I definitely understand not wanting to be mistaken for a sixteen-year-old.

So, I was like, you know, you should spike your hair up. You should try the hair spiky-thingy. And as I'm suggesting this, I'm picturing it and thinking it would look pretty decent, and probably not be difficult to do, either. But he's vehemently disagreeing with me as I'm suggesting this, and I'm like, what, why not? What's wrong with spiky hair?

And his response totally baffled me.

He said, "no way, I'd look like a twink."

WHAT. THE FUCK.

Oh f-list mine, do you know what a twink is? I mean, I know what a twink is. But I was pretty sure it wasn't part of the vocabulary of a straight boy from South Jersey. Don't... I mean... isn't that just a word that gay people use? To describe other gay people? Or am I totally wrong, and everyone knows and uses this word? Cause it's not something I hear often, I mean, it's not a word I've heard, well, pretty much ever since I've lived here, except from my neighbors' son, last summer, and he's gay.

Or... is there another meaning to the word twink that I don't know?

And anyone who suggests that my boyfriend really isn't just a straight boy from South Jersey is getting a massive eye-roll. No, we don't know every.single.thing about each other. But we're quite aware of each other's sexual preferences, thanks. THAT is something we've spilled to each other in detail. He's straight.

Which is why I don't understand why the concept of "looking like a twink" is something that would even enter his head.

Somehow we went right from talking about hair stuff to my clothes being ALL OVER the floor and how I just generally turn everywhere I am into a huge mess, and I was so shocked by the twink comment that I said absolutely nothing about it, and kind of forgot about it until now.

But I'm not letting this one go. I want to know where that came from!

Yes Really

Mar. 17th, 2009 01:56 am
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Swear to God a bug just flew into my eye.

Yes really.
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Erica.

Has returned.

And holy fuck have I missed her.

In a very un-Erica like move, though, she has yet to spill anything about Virginia or wherever else she's been. But she's here now. On my futon.

Not to stay, of course, just to spend the night.

It's not every day someone disappears and then actually reappears.
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A few thing I could write about tonight:

! The fact that I'm in intolerable pain and have been curled up in a ball for the past hour waiting for my drugs to work, and since I've only got the shitty drugs, well, they're not working so well

@ The five things [livejournal.com profile] ithildyn gave me to write about in her meme entry

# My overnight job at Wawa and my first impressions of the "Wawa Lifers"

$ How I watched that movie "W" and hated it

% My car and how it's falling apart and yet somehow I'm not that bad at driving in snowstorms

^ My boyfriend has been acting kind of weird, not like himself much at all and I'm baffled as to what's going on with him

& This girl at work and how she asks me for a tampon about once a month - I'm pretty irresponsible and yet I don't go around asking other girls for tampons on a regular basis

* How I discovered white hairs in with my normal hairs

( How I've fallen headfirst into another Harry Potter fanfic idea, even after I said I wouldn't be suckered by romance

) I want a tattoo
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What are you doing chillin' with Jason Voorhees at Crystal Lake anyway? Can't you just salt and burn him and be done with it?

And:

Not that I consider slasher flicks to be the epitome of sexual representation, but... when drunk and in the midst of sex, do most people announce when they're about to come?

Oh well, what do I know. It's not like I watch drunk people having sex anyway... lol.
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Brilliant: scoring last minute Flyers tickets on stubhub for ten bucks, flying up the expressway and over the Ben, parking at Citizens Bank Park to avoid all traffic, and watching the Flyers lose horribly... and calling that a Valentine's Day date.

Not So Brilliant: wearing only a hoodie. It's freakin' February, why did I not think it might be cold?
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Can anyone remember when they last used the expression "no duh?"

WTF

Jan. 11th, 2009 04:50 pm
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Ok so. Today. It was cold outside. My hands were cold. So I got in the car, shut the door, turned on the heat, and stuck my hands under my legs to warm them up. Then I shivered. Cause, like I said, it was cold. And somehow, the motion of an involuntary shiver while my hands were pinned under my legs caused this loud thundering CRACK to come from my shoulder and it fucking HURT.

It hurt so much I was literally seeing stars, and I thought I was going to pass out right there.

WTF was that? What did I do? I couldn't have dislocated it, could I have? (I didn't)

And so I'm waiting for this searing pain to start, but... it doesn't. After the shock, I guess, that nearly knocked me out, it didn't hurt after that. I moved my arm up and down. Ok. No pain. I got out of the car, just to make sure I could, and stood up, and got back in - Ok. Didn't hurt. So what the fuck was that?

But then later, when I got to work, I realized that it does hurt. When I reach behind me, like, the motion you do to take off your coat? That hurts. Not hideously. Not intolerably. Just in a "hm, something's not right here" kind of way.

And so I repeat: WTF did I do?
exhilaration: (espresso)
A catchy subject line

A humorous re-telling of my day

An optimistic view of the world

A satisfied view of my life

A warm and fuzzy feeling one gets from thinking about loved ones

Favorite things

Enjoyable activities

Fun ways to pass the time

Intellectual pursuits

Bragging rights

Pride

A sense of accomplishment

Love

No need for a definition, simply proving it exists

No anxiety and sleepless nights

No staring out the window without seeing the street

Mars bars and shooting stars

Carnivals

Freak shows

A place for everyone and everyone has their place

The bird woman does the chicken dance on the dining hall table

The little girl dances barefoot on the sand

Under the moonlight

Next to the ocean

Listening

Ear to the ground

Head to the grindstone

Never looking back

Cut this and paste it

A touching tale

A clever retelling

Find me

And tell me it was written

Say it was done
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(As opposed to the drunken, non-sensical one from last night!)

So. I've written a companion story to the first story I wrote, so maybe I will be doing NaNo after all, and just make it a collection of short stories - I certainly have the time to do it, anyway >.<

Erica and I drank two bottles of wine the other night - then I felt the need to update my LJ. I deleted that entry. B and I drank a couple six-packs last night and, lo and behold, I felt the need to update my LJ then too. I deleted that one as well. Usually I don't drink like this, I swear! But I'm bored, and I can't go anywhere. Part of the reason I just don't drink much is cause if I'm drunk (as opposed to buzzed) I really can't walk. Well - I can't walk right now anyway. So I figured I might as well.

So... I've been hungover the past few mornings. Yeah. Fun times. I am SOOOO responsible. Yeah right. Parents go away and the kids eat chocolate cake for breakfast is more like it. Responsible is not my middle name.

I wasn't going to update anyway because I really don't have anything worth saying. I've been thinking about a lot of shit recently, you know, since I've been home doing NOTHING, but none of it is anything I want to share. It all just makes me angry, and I'm really not in the mood to be angry right now.

I was listening to my voice posts (and reading all my entries) earlier and I made an observation about the way I speak: I only sound like I'm from Central PA when I've been home by myself all day. The more I'm around other people the more Philly I sound. So I guess I sound totally Central Pennsylvanian right now, since I've been home by myself for... too many days.

Bevan and I cuddled on the couch last night. I know this doesn't sound like such a big deal but to me it really is. It's... a really nice thing to, for once, feel like more than just an interesting person or a convenient friend or whatever, and more like someone who's actually deserving of... comfort. I don't know how else to explain it. I am really not the kind of person who is a "cuddler," you know, who snuggles up to all their friends. I see other people do it - I know other people can be like that, but I'm not. I know you don't even have to be particularly close to someone to cuddle up with them - but you DO both have to be comfortable with it. And I'm usually not, but... this time it was really nice.

We're still not totally cool with each other. Well, I don't know what's going on in his head, but my head can't forget what happened after the wedding. The whole time I was thinking this is nice the other part of me was going yeah, but, remember....
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I think people would think I'm funnier if only they were as dorky as I am.

For example:

(bemoans a co-worker) "How do I get a chick to go out with me?"

(my advice) "Just tell her it travels in time."

*blank stare*

OR

I work in a restaurant. The managers carry green cards with them that can be swiped on the computers. Everyone else's card is white. Sometimes the managers let other employees use their green cards. This is called "having power."

(asks a co-worker) "Hey, I need power, does anyone have power?"

(me) "I do, I have the power!" *holds up green manager card* "I can defeat anything! Unless it's yellow, of course. Green doesn't work on yellow, you know."

*blank stare*

Blegh

Oct. 1st, 2008 06:28 pm
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No, that's all. Just blegh.
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The letters have worn off the s, d, n, m, k, l, and e on my keyboard.

It's cool, though, obviously I am surviving... maybe I can write them on with sharpie?

Now ALL of my kitchen is in my living room... this is a good thing, although irritating.

There are four pairs of white boots on their way here. I want to make sure I get the right size, see :P

I am in a mood. What kind of mood? I don't know. I'm not sure. I'm not feeling like myself. I'm not really sure why.

I am the worst lesbian in the world, that much is certain. That's one of the key things I identify myself as. Maybe that is my problem. Maybe my problem is that I should never have let my sexual orientation define me as much as it has.

I've known too many girls who have been all "yeah I'm such a lesbian" and then the next thing you know they've got a boyfriend. I look down my nose in scorn at those girls.

Somewhere, somebody is out having a really good time. Somewhere, someone is realizing something for the first time. Somewhere, someone is deciding to change something. Somewhere, someone is doing exactly what they did yesterday and loving it. Somewhere, someone is totally, completely happy. Somewhere, someone only has a minute more to live. Somewhere, someone is dreaming something they'll forget upon waking.

Maybe somewhere, someone is thinking about me.

Wondering what I'm doing.

Wondering if I'm okay.

Wondering if I ever think about them.

Wondering what would happen if they tried to find me.

I don't fuck things up on purpose, you know. Somehow it just seems to happen, I don't know.
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As always, so totally not my vid, not my toes, not my annoying song!



So. If you have twelve toes, do you have to pay extra for a pedicure?

Seriously. Is this not the coolest thing?
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Can someone from Pennsylvania Dutch Country please mail me a Shoofly pie?

I just read a fanfic that mentioned shoofly pie. And now I want one.

And I'm positive that there is not a single slice on this island.

Anyone? Bail me out? Help me cave to my craving?

Shoofly pie with coffee ice cream. Obviously. The only way it can ever be consumed.
exhilaration: (doctor who)
Midnight )

Turn Left )

The Incredible Hulk )

I have a plant now. It's in my living room window and it's named Romana. Cause I decided to name it, and it seems people tend to name their plants Fred, and the Doctor named Romana Fred, so I thought therefor Romana is a good name for a plant :P

Well Well

Jun. 1st, 2008 09:18 pm
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Well well, if it isn't Little Miss Lara home from a weekend of loser-dom?

Whatever, obviously I am not a loser if I've had such an exciting weekend.

If I annoy Jury, whatever. She doesn't have to hang out with me. If Bevan wants to ditch me because I annoy his girlfriend, whatever. Nothing lasts for long.

Friday night I worked late and came home and started watching my downloads of "The Dresden Files" and I'm thinking I like the books better, but we'll see.

It rained yesterday, so laying out in the sun with Erica was pretty much out of the question. I stayed home and watched some more Dresden Files. Bevan called to see if I wanted to come over and play rock band and I said no thanks, god forbid I annoy Jury or anything. Erica didn't actually call me anyway, but that's fine because it was raining anyway. Saturday night I did take out at the restaurant and made about an extra thirty bucks from people tipping on take out, which is always good. I then spent that money on buying shots for one of my co-workers who is joining the army. Meaning yeah, I did go to a bar after work, after I said I wasn't doing that anymore.

Today it was nice out and Erica did call and did ask me to come over and lay out with her, but I managed to talk her into coming over here instead, and on her way to the island she stopped at the liquor store and picked up sangria, and we sat on the porch and drank that.

So, yeah. I was being sarcastic about loser-dom but really, I don't have all that much to say tonight, not about myself, anyway. Very exciting. I work, and I drink, and that's about it for me.

I did watch my Doctor Who download, and again, I'm reserving judgement for when I get to see the second part. It seems really promising. I have a ton of speculations about Dr. River Song, of course. But it took me a while to realize I've already seen her on ER :P

That's it for now.
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Ok so there's this old movie called Buffalo 66 that I used to watch with my friends when I was a teenager. The girl in the movie always ordered hot chocolate. I thought she was cool, so I always ordered hot chocolate. My girlfriend at the time also always ordered hot chocolate, and specified that she wanted whipped cream. I thought that was cool too.

Now I always order coffee. Bevan always orders coffee. And not because either of us particularly loves coffee. It's because there's no reason to go out and sit in a diner anymore unless it's because you need your caffeine fix and you're fucking exhausted.

AINT IT GREAT BEING GROWN UP?
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I really, really am. And tomorrow starts the 20 blocks at 4am horror - horror of horrors!

So in other words, I've got to go to bed! I have a whole lot to say, though, and I guess I'll probably elaborate on this stuff later in the week or something.

1. People are disgusting. Seriously. Being a hostess in a restaurant has just reinforced this opinion of mine. People make me want to puke. This is me, puking from too much exposure to stupidity and nastiness.

2. I have soooo many good things to say (and a few bad things to say) about the new episode of Doctor Who!

3. I spent over 48 hours straight with Bevan this weekend. We are definitely friends. It is very cool. I have a friend.

4. My upstairs is completely finished and ready to rent, however my first renters backed out on me. I should have kept their deposit I guess, but I didn't, I gave it back. I am too nice. Niceness is not good for business.

5. I didn't talk to my mom today. I never talk to her. I didn't even think about her until just now.

6. Krissy IMed me and wants me to come to Philly to visit her this week. I shouldn't go. I really want to go. I am probably going to go.

7. I drove my car two blocks. Breakin' the law, breakin' the law!

8. I did not consume any alcohol this weekend, nor did I go to any bars.

9. I would like to find some Iron Man/War Machine slash, please. Or I could probably handle some Tony Stark/Pepper Potts.

10. Is it bad to comment on people's entries with just one word, or just an emoticon? I don't always have anything to say, and sometimes I just like to leave something saying "hey, I'm reading you."

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Lara I.

October 2012

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