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Aug. 13th, 2007 11:44 pmAnd so. This has been a very eventful summer. And I say that with the utmost seriousness.
Some things have happened.
I own two houses. I inherited them from my grandparents. I had no idea this was going to happen. I don't know if all the grandchildren inherited hugely valuable things, or if it was only me because I'm the one who was there for them these past few years, but my family is so screwed up and uncommunicative that it is unlikely I will ever find out.
I did not go to the funeral, by the way. I assumed that my parents would be there and I did not want to see them.
So, these two houses: it would have been worth my while to just sell the properties and take the money. But I'm really, really bad with holding on to money, and I'm really, really good at racking up debt. In fact, I just racked up some debt just now: I took out a loan, a big one. A really huge one: I have more money now than I ever have in my entire life. But see, I own two properties. So the bank was basically like, sure, we'll give you whatever you want!
The bigger house, the most disasterous one, is going to be gutted and totally re-done, competely. The other one, well, I have been/am in the process of using the money I have to slowly turn it into a real house as opposed to like a disaster of a falling down building. Actually, two houses. I'm just working on the first floor for now. And yes, I am still here in New Jersey, and yes, I have been sort of living in the one house.
I've also been sort of living with Krissy. I don't actually see her much because she is doing her ER rotation this summer, or whatever. But she gave me a key to her place, so I have been putting it to good use, even if it just means her coming home to find me already passed the fuck out in her bed.
Like I said, it's been fun. Sigh. I'm getting old. I really am. I was inspecting my face for wrinkles the other day. I didn't find any; just the regular old dark circles under my eyes and they've been there for a while. Every so often I look at myself and think, well, I guess I'm fairly attractive, if nothing else, but really, there's got to be more to it than that. There's lots of attractive girls out there, more attractive than me, and they're like, healthy and normal and stuff and don't whine and moan all the time and fuck their lives up at every turn. So I'd better keep that 1000 watt charm beaming brightly, or she's gonna get real sick of me real fast.
And sick, did I mention sick? I've been sick this summer. Legitimately sick, and too stupid to know it. I guess I've spent so much time just trying to ignore pain that I've lost the common sense to think, hey, if I hurt, something must be wrong.
I have a job; I am a hostess at a restaurant on the other side of the bay. Was a good move, getting a job there, cause there are lots of nice servers looking for extra money who can do things like fix up a house. They're worked as contractors before, and stuff, and everyone always needs a little extra money here and there. Conveniently, I even have the funds to pay them. And I help where I can - I painted the porch railing, lol. It's been hot and I've been sick and I have money and the money is specifically for fixing up the houses so... still I feel like a huge bum and a huge diva for just sitting around directing people on how I want things done.
And... I made a couple friends, or friendly aquaintences, anyway, at the restaurant, just a couple girls who like to invite me out for drinks every so often. I know, I know, I said I was done with having friends, but I said I was done with having girlfriends too and it seems I kinda sorta maybe somewhat have one, sort of. Anyway, we're not close or anything and maybe it'll be different, maybe I'm not so toxic of a friend when I have my own couch to sleep on.
Who knows?
Some things have happened.
I own two houses. I inherited them from my grandparents. I had no idea this was going to happen. I don't know if all the grandchildren inherited hugely valuable things, or if it was only me because I'm the one who was there for them these past few years, but my family is so screwed up and uncommunicative that it is unlikely I will ever find out.
I did not go to the funeral, by the way. I assumed that my parents would be there and I did not want to see them.
So, these two houses: it would have been worth my while to just sell the properties and take the money. But I'm really, really bad with holding on to money, and I'm really, really good at racking up debt. In fact, I just racked up some debt just now: I took out a loan, a big one. A really huge one: I have more money now than I ever have in my entire life. But see, I own two properties. So the bank was basically like, sure, we'll give you whatever you want!
The bigger house, the most disasterous one, is going to be gutted and totally re-done, competely. The other one, well, I have been/am in the process of using the money I have to slowly turn it into a real house as opposed to like a disaster of a falling down building. Actually, two houses. I'm just working on the first floor for now. And yes, I am still here in New Jersey, and yes, I have been sort of living in the one house.
I've also been sort of living with Krissy. I don't actually see her much because she is doing her ER rotation this summer, or whatever. But she gave me a key to her place, so I have been putting it to good use, even if it just means her coming home to find me already passed the fuck out in her bed.
Like I said, it's been fun. Sigh. I'm getting old. I really am. I was inspecting my face for wrinkles the other day. I didn't find any; just the regular old dark circles under my eyes and they've been there for a while. Every so often I look at myself and think, well, I guess I'm fairly attractive, if nothing else, but really, there's got to be more to it than that. There's lots of attractive girls out there, more attractive than me, and they're like, healthy and normal and stuff and don't whine and moan all the time and fuck their lives up at every turn. So I'd better keep that 1000 watt charm beaming brightly, or she's gonna get real sick of me real fast.
And sick, did I mention sick? I've been sick this summer. Legitimately sick, and too stupid to know it. I guess I've spent so much time just trying to ignore pain that I've lost the common sense to think, hey, if I hurt, something must be wrong.
I have a job; I am a hostess at a restaurant on the other side of the bay. Was a good move, getting a job there, cause there are lots of nice servers looking for extra money who can do things like fix up a house. They're worked as contractors before, and stuff, and everyone always needs a little extra money here and there. Conveniently, I even have the funds to pay them. And I help where I can - I painted the porch railing, lol. It's been hot and I've been sick and I have money and the money is specifically for fixing up the houses so... still I feel like a huge bum and a huge diva for just sitting around directing people on how I want things done.
And... I made a couple friends, or friendly aquaintences, anyway, at the restaurant, just a couple girls who like to invite me out for drinks every so often. I know, I know, I said I was done with having friends, but I said I was done with having girlfriends too and it seems I kinda sorta maybe somewhat have one, sort of. Anyway, we're not close or anything and maybe it'll be different, maybe I'm not so toxic of a friend when I have my own couch to sleep on.
Who knows?
