The Dork Is Me

I think people would think I'm funnier if only they were as dorky as I am.

For example:

(bemoans a co-worker) "How do I get a chick to go out with me?"

(my advice) "Just tell her it travels in time."

*blank stare*

OR

I work in a restaurant. The managers carry green cards with them that can be swiped on the computers. Everyone else's card is white. Sometimes the managers let other employees use their green cards. This is called "having power."

(asks a co-worker) "Hey, I need power, does anyone have power?"

(me) "I do, I have the power!" *holds up green manager card* "I can defeat anything! Unless it's yellow, of course. Green doesn't work on yellow, you know."

*blank stare*