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All I Want For Christmas
Dec. 4th, 2008 11:35 pm1. I want for no one in the world to take more than they need when those around them do not have enough.
2. I want for everyone in the world to have the ability and the will to imagine themselves in the shoes of another.
3. I want to know that love really can mean everything and solve anything.
I don't ask for much, do I?
The holidays have never been easy for me. When I was a kid I would get excited, and I'd imagine this wonderful day, but in reality it was often spent steeping in stress and doubting intentions. My parents, although they share a household, are not married, and it was never a guarantee that I'd have both parents home for Christmas. My dad has another family besides us, and it is entirely possible that he has a third as well. I have older half-siblings I've never met, and I've recently begin to suspect I've got younger ones besides.
The older I got the harder it was to rely on the "spirit of the season" to make it the happy occasion it was supposed to be. I was happiest not celebrating at all; just eating Chinese with my best friend, drinking, at watching movies all day long. In recent years, I've been alone for the holidays, and that's been the worst.
I find the Christmas Spirit to be really trying, especially this year since I've got a job in retail. The "spend spend spend" mentality makes me feel ill, and the materialism of it all is so counter to the way I was raised.
My birthday is in mid-January, and I'm not a big fan of my birthday either. It tends to get passed over since it's so close to the holidays, and besides that, I don't have great associations with the anniversary of my birth anyway. And, to top it all off, I'm turning twenty-five this year. I'd rather be young forever, or, if I can't have that, I'd have liked to have actually accomplished something worthwhile with my life by the time I hit the quarter century mark.
And even with all this, I can't help but feel I have no business even calling these facts "problems." And I don't, of course. I have even less of an excuse than the average American, because I've seen the third world rather than just read about it or heard about it mentioned somewhere by someone.
"Peace on earth; goodwill towards men." We sure could use some of that. Prop 8. Mumbai. The cholera in Zimbabwe, the pirates in Somalia, and then of course the people starving to death in my very own first world country, children without access to health care dying from easily curable illnesses, in my very own first world country.
And it's right around this time of year, too, that I'm always reminded that love doesn't fix a thing. It doesn't fix a single thing.
2. I want for everyone in the world to have the ability and the will to imagine themselves in the shoes of another.
3. I want to know that love really can mean everything and solve anything.
I don't ask for much, do I?
The holidays have never been easy for me. When I was a kid I would get excited, and I'd imagine this wonderful day, but in reality it was often spent steeping in stress and doubting intentions. My parents, although they share a household, are not married, and it was never a guarantee that I'd have both parents home for Christmas. My dad has another family besides us, and it is entirely possible that he has a third as well. I have older half-siblings I've never met, and I've recently begin to suspect I've got younger ones besides.
The older I got the harder it was to rely on the "spirit of the season" to make it the happy occasion it was supposed to be. I was happiest not celebrating at all; just eating Chinese with my best friend, drinking, at watching movies all day long. In recent years, I've been alone for the holidays, and that's been the worst.
I find the Christmas Spirit to be really trying, especially this year since I've got a job in retail. The "spend spend spend" mentality makes me feel ill, and the materialism of it all is so counter to the way I was raised.
My birthday is in mid-January, and I'm not a big fan of my birthday either. It tends to get passed over since it's so close to the holidays, and besides that, I don't have great associations with the anniversary of my birth anyway. And, to top it all off, I'm turning twenty-five this year. I'd rather be young forever, or, if I can't have that, I'd have liked to have actually accomplished something worthwhile with my life by the time I hit the quarter century mark.
And even with all this, I can't help but feel I have no business even calling these facts "problems." And I don't, of course. I have even less of an excuse than the average American, because I've seen the third world rather than just read about it or heard about it mentioned somewhere by someone.
"Peace on earth; goodwill towards men." We sure could use some of that. Prop 8. Mumbai. The cholera in Zimbabwe, the pirates in Somalia, and then of course the people starving to death in my very own first world country, children without access to health care dying from easily curable illnesses, in my very own first world country.
And it's right around this time of year, too, that I'm always reminded that love doesn't fix a thing. It doesn't fix a single thing.
