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The Easter Bonnet Of Doom
Apr. 13th, 2009 09:52 pmSo. Sunday morning at the restaurant is always the L&B, JJ&C show. JJ and Chris are the opening servers, B opens the bar, and I am the opening host. They have to be there at 930, I have to be there at 1030 but am usually there at 930 anyway, since either I've come to work with B because I slept over, or I came right from Wawa, where I get off at 9am, so it just makes sense not to go home (and possibly fall asleep on the couch or something...) This has been the weekly thing for over a year now - JJ cleans the dining room in her PJs, Chris smokes cigarettes and reads the paper for an hour and then does a really half-assed job of set up, I cut all B's fruit for him and he mops the floor in the vestibule for me.
So basically, every Sunday morning I cut fruit liek whoaz. I cut so much fruit. I make lemon slices, lemon wheels, lemon twists - lime slices, wheels, and twists - orange slices and wheels and orange cherry flags and lime cherry flags and orange lemon lime cherry skewers and peach slices and peach cubes and peach rings and peach cherry flags, strawberry halves and strawberry slices and scored strawberries, blueberry spears, cranberry spears, raspberry spears, mango cubes, mango cranberry spears, mango strawberry spears - (this is where it gets crazy) olive spears, onion spears, onion rings, pepper rings, olive onion rings, YES REALLY olive onion pepperoni spears, olive onion pepperoni spicy bean lime spears -
So. Since it was Easter and all, well, I figured I needed an Easter bonnet. You know, for church (lol whatever.) So, using the materials available to me (styrofoam plate and prism stixs and plastic wrap) I made myself a lovely church hat piled with fruit skewers.
It was a hit. I tried to wear it for my shift but after we'd been open for like a half hour Vicky, my GM, said I had to take it off because it was unsanitary - as if people would somehow get the idea that the fruit on my plate-hat might end up served to them or something, I don't know.
I didn't goof off like this when I was a kid. I was not anything close to the class clown. But these days I just can't resist turning everything absurd :P
So basically, every Sunday morning I cut fruit liek whoaz. I cut so much fruit. I make lemon slices, lemon wheels, lemon twists - lime slices, wheels, and twists - orange slices and wheels and orange cherry flags and lime cherry flags and orange lemon lime cherry skewers and peach slices and peach cubes and peach rings and peach cherry flags, strawberry halves and strawberry slices and scored strawberries, blueberry spears, cranberry spears, raspberry spears, mango cubes, mango cranberry spears, mango strawberry spears - (this is where it gets crazy) olive spears, onion spears, onion rings, pepper rings, olive onion rings, YES REALLY olive onion pepperoni spears, olive onion pepperoni spicy bean lime spears -
So. Since it was Easter and all, well, I figured I needed an Easter bonnet. You know, for church (lol whatever.) So, using the materials available to me (styrofoam plate and prism stixs and plastic wrap) I made myself a lovely church hat piled with fruit skewers.
It was a hit. I tried to wear it for my shift but after we'd been open for like a half hour Vicky, my GM, said I had to take it off because it was unsanitary - as if people would somehow get the idea that the fruit on my plate-hat might end up served to them or something, I don't know.
I didn't goof off like this when I was a kid. I was not anything close to the class clown. But these days I just can't resist turning everything absurd :P
