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I Need Another Job
Jan. 8th, 2007 03:07 pmJulia called me this morning and told me not to come in to work. I think she's trying to save on hours or something. I know she told me she had a full-time position for me, but she really doesn't. Not unless she gets rid of her intern, and she's not going to do that because the intern works for free.
I'm not holding it against her or anything, but I've only been working about 25-30 hours or so. I got that first check, the one for all the work for her I've done so far, and it's not enough.
Not even close.
One, I'm never going to be able to pay back the city for the fine I owe. It's huge. It can't be done. But I do have to pay a certain amount every two weeks. So I payed that. I payed the minimum on my credit card, which I'm never going to be able to pay back that whole think either. I bought a phone, because I've been trying to get a second job and I can't because I have no address, no phone number, and nevermind the criminal record.
I wonder how much of this I can hide from?
If I close my bank account...
I mean, I've been paying my credit card online, out of my account. If I close the account and just cash all my checks, will my credit card ever be able to even find me? After all, I don't have an address. But then, I won't be able to use the card either, so I don't know how much good that would do me in the end.
I could sell this computer I guess. But I'd rather not. I don't know how much good it would do me, in the end, anyway. I need a ton more money than what this machine is worth. It would be like a speck in a bucket, or whatever.
If I could find a second job, I might be all right with money, but just barely. As it is, I have about 40 bucks to last me until next paycheck.
But, I hate to say it, I don't know how well I could handle a second job. That's a lot of hours to work. I've done it before, of course, of course I have, but I feel like I couldn't do it now. I feel like I've really been knocked off my feet here, figuratively, anyway. I can, literally, stand. Just to clarify that.
I'm thinking a restaruant. I'm thinking I could be a hostess somewhere? Restaurants generally don't care about criminal records, I don't think. And they hire immediately. So maybe that's where I should be looking?
I'm trying, I really am. I'm trying to look up every day, be happy I'm alive and be happy the sun shines and all that, but all I can think of is how am I ever going to climb out of this?
And I'm so fucking lonely.
I'm not holding it against her or anything, but I've only been working about 25-30 hours or so. I got that first check, the one for all the work for her I've done so far, and it's not enough.
Not even close.
One, I'm never going to be able to pay back the city for the fine I owe. It's huge. It can't be done. But I do have to pay a certain amount every two weeks. So I payed that. I payed the minimum on my credit card, which I'm never going to be able to pay back that whole think either. I bought a phone, because I've been trying to get a second job and I can't because I have no address, no phone number, and nevermind the criminal record.
I wonder how much of this I can hide from?
If I close my bank account...
I mean, I've been paying my credit card online, out of my account. If I close the account and just cash all my checks, will my credit card ever be able to even find me? After all, I don't have an address. But then, I won't be able to use the card either, so I don't know how much good that would do me in the end.
I could sell this computer I guess. But I'd rather not. I don't know how much good it would do me, in the end, anyway. I need a ton more money than what this machine is worth. It would be like a speck in a bucket, or whatever.
If I could find a second job, I might be all right with money, but just barely. As it is, I have about 40 bucks to last me until next paycheck.
But, I hate to say it, I don't know how well I could handle a second job. That's a lot of hours to work. I've done it before, of course, of course I have, but I feel like I couldn't do it now. I feel like I've really been knocked off my feet here, figuratively, anyway. I can, literally, stand. Just to clarify that.
I'm thinking a restaruant. I'm thinking I could be a hostess somewhere? Restaurants generally don't care about criminal records, I don't think. And they hire immediately. So maybe that's where I should be looking?
I'm trying, I really am. I'm trying to look up every day, be happy I'm alive and be happy the sun shines and all that, but all I can think of is how am I ever going to climb out of this?
And I'm so fucking lonely.
