exhilaration | Xenathon, Dea

I was so pissed off today from work that I just had to come home and watch me some more Xena.

7. The Titans

I thought this episode was really pretty weak. Kind of has a monster-of-the-week feel to it or something. Xena is still her super-stoic self - she only gets emotional and excited when she's fighting someone and something, and then of course she kicks ass. So when, at the end of the ep, she calls Gabrielle her friend, it's pretty heavy, cause by now we're clear that she certainly doesn't take this kind of thing lightly.

8. Prometheus

This is the first Xena episode I ever saw and I'm pretty sure I thought I was watching Hercules (being that, you know, he's in it.) I watched Herc too, and that series is totally bad-ass as well, and I don't think I realized from the beginning that Xena had her own show.

In my head, I fully believe they did it. At some point. Xena and Herc. They totally did. Maybe not in this episode (okay definitely not) but at some other time in their lives, they definitely did. And any attraction to each other in this ep seemed really forced to me - which works, it really does. They're drawn to each other but I don't think they really realize why, so it seems like it might be romance. Obviously it's that they're both half-god (yes, score another point for Xena being only half mortal) and they've never met anyone like themselves before. I find it alarming how ready both of them were to sacrifice themselves for the greater good rather than try to put their heads together to figure away to avoid sacrificing anyone's life. I mean, in the end it worked out, but they both went into it assuming one of them would die.

9. Death In Chains

Gabrielle! What is that you're wearing? What happened to that long and frumpy skirt of yours? Oh, finally realized how hard it is to run around after Xena wearing all that material, huh? Or, wait, you finally realized you're a sexy little thing and might as well show it off? And, oh wait, what's this? The midriff of your shirt, is it riding up just a bit? Is that... could that be your adorable belly button peeking out?

Anyway. This'll be the second time Xena saves all of mankind, I mean, first she and Hercules rescue Prometheus, giving humans back their ability to heal themselves, and now, she's going to rescue Death. Meanwhile, Gabrielle mets herself a nice storyteller - I think it's so adorable how she wants to meet her "other half" like in her story about how people used to have two heads and four legs and then they were split in half and had one head and two legs each but shared a soul - and I really like how Xena has some kind of history with Sisyphus.

Sisyphus is the guy who pushes the boulder up the hill only to have it roll back down again, day after day after day for all eternity. I know, because right around when Xena was on TV I was studying Greek mythology in middle school and I took a liking to this Sisyphus guy and wrote lots of gothy poetry about him. (These days we'd call that emo, but back then, it was considered goth - whatever)

This must be a different Sisyphus though.

I was sad for Gabrielle when her guy-of-choice died, though. That was sad. For her, I mean. I guess that's what happens when you travel around a lot - you leave a whole lot behind every time you move on.

10. Hooves and Harlots

Gabrielle! Your skirt! What happened to the other, cuter outfit? Was that just for what's-his-name? And Xena, she's wearing a clip in her hair, imagine that! Much better than that strange headband she wore in the pilot, that's for sure.

Uh huh, and here, we have Amazons. Xena's not really a favorite of theirs, but I think these must be different Amazons. Gabrielle seems pretty enthralled, though (of course) and she's pretty enthralled with the Centaurs, too, another group of whom Xena is not a favorite.

That was a pretty fantastic battle there when Xena fights the Amazon Queen with the things - chobos? - and I love how Xena gives that dirty look to anyone who asks if she's an Amazon and then adds that she should be.

Man, it'd be great to be Gabrielle, wouldn't it? I mean, to run away from home tagging along after Xena, to not be ditched somewhere in an inn by Xena cause you've actually managed to endear yourself to her, and then suddenly, ho'shit, you're an Amazon princess and you've got a fighting staff (and a cuter outfit.)

11. The Black Wolf

So, Xena's just strolling along, getting new shoes for Argo and planning on getting some new shoes for herself too, and sees a scuffle and is like, yes! I get to kick some ass! And so she does, and makes a deal that will hopefully end in ten thousand dinars and new shoes for her (I know she wants the shoes but pretty sure she wants to give away the dinars)

And THEN Gabrielle shows up, not wearing her Amazon outfit but the short skirt is back and so is her almost-belly button. But oh, Gabs, the hat? Really? (It's Xena's chakram in disguise, so I'll excuse it...) So anyway, Xena's in the dungeon but it's cool, she went there on purpose.

"I have many skills."

She said it! She says it first in ep 11, how about that? So, she can pretty much fly, she can fight, she knows healing skills, I'm pretty sure she can see in the dark (right?) and... she can embroider. Go Xena!

The, ah, villain's name, I get it, it's Greek, it's Kulas, fine. But it sounds an awful lot like culos, and that, my friends, is Spanish for assholes. So... I giggle when I hear it, what can I say?

I have to wonder for how long Xena can pull off these deceptions where she pretends she's still Evil Xena? How long is it going to take for her reputation as a doer of good deeds to catch up with her?

12. Beware of Greeks Bearing Gifts

Gabrielle has hiked her shirt up a little more so now her belly button is fully visible. See what kind of influence Xena has on her.

So... Perdicus, Gabrielle's betrothed, is a soldier in the Trojan army? This is odd, but no one else seems to think it's odd. Xena is definitely identified as Greek, they don't even want to let her in the city cause she's a Greek warrior, but aren't Gabrielle and Perdicus Greek too?

Helen and Paras aren't in love - I bet they weren't in real life either, shit like that never happens that way. Wonder how Helen and Xena got to be friends... being that, lets see... the Trojan war has been going on for ten years, and in season two, "ten years ago" Xena had a pirate ship and was ga-ga for Ceasar... So perhaps they met on Xena's pirate ship? Or before Xena had a pirate ship, so before she was reallyreally bad?

In the end Helen's all Scarlette O'Hara with her "where will I go, what will I do?" but I like that she made her own way.

I like that Perdicus made Gabrielle feel a little bad for ditching him - cause she did, she turned her back on every single thing in her life to go follow after Xena, even after Xena told her not to come. I mean, yeah, now Xena calls her a friend. But she called her a pest at first.

13. Athens Academy of the Performing Bards

I love Gabrielle's storytelling voice. In fact, I love how Gabrielle is so... no, it's not her innocence, it's her... freshness? It's that she's never looking over her shoulder afraid someone's caught her making a fool of herself. She just goes all out - even if she's not quite pulling it off. She does that anyway. I love that. And that, as we learn in the episode, is part of why her stories are so loved - cause she doesn't care about anyone's reaction to them. She just tells them cause she loves it.

I love Xena too but come on. She's Xena. She's not even totally mortal! (point!)

Ugh, this ep has a flashback to the pilot where Xena's wearing that funny headband and the music has that bizarre growling in it.

But! It also has a flashback to Xena in the Hercules episode, and, imagine that... Xena is in a tub with Iolus. Yep. The tub. Xena always finds the tubs :P Also.. she is wearing the funny headband again. This whole episode almost, but not quite, a clip show. Interspersed in there are clips of what I'm pretty sure are old Hercules films. That is definitely a Hercules film - right? I think it is. And then, wonder of wonders, there's "Sparticus" too!

I actually have a whole lot to say about this episode. The theme's of Xena's series are good vs. evil, redemption, forgiveness, destiny, etc... and love. And love, oh, do I ever have a lot to say about love.

You know the book, the Giving Tree, Shel Silverstein? Basically a parable telling us that to love someone is to destroy yourself, and to be loved by someone is to destroy them. Coincidentally, this is also the "falcon story" from Cassandra Claire's "Draco Trilogy" HP fanfiction that she re-used in her original book "City of Bones."

Replace "destroy" with "betray" and you've got something a little less dramatic and very, very true. To love someone is to betray yourself - to be loved by someone is to betray them. If Gabrielle loves Xena she'll stay with her, travel with her, etc. And she won't go to the Academy like she always dreamed she would. She betrays her own dreams to stay with the one she loves... and for Xena, to be loved by Gabrielle is to change her, to watch her betray herself, to betray her.

Not the typical way to look at this episode, cause G&X certainly aren't throwing the L word around quite yet. But in a backward look - there it is, starting already. By the end of the series, I don't doubt that they have a very pure love for each other. But... love doesn't fix a single thing in the end.

So the question is, is it really love if it destroys you?

I don't know. This is the stuff that propels people through their entire lives, this is the stuff that's the muse for countless works of art, literature, music... if it isn't love, what do we call it then?

And... does it really destroy you if you loved every minute of it?

I've kind of spent my entire life looking for one shred of evidence that this Giving Tree definition of love is false, that that is not what real love is, and that real love is something else entirely. But I haven't found it yet, so until then, it's the Giving Tree. And since love is one of the Xena story themes, well, it's going to come up again and again and again.

14. Fistful of Dinars

Tsk. Gabrielle, Nonamia? The land of Nonamia, yeah right anyone is going to fall for that... oh wait. It worked. Well done.

And, holy shite, Xena, just you and Petricles can throw so many spears they think a while army is attacking them!

Uh huh. Petricles. This is Xena's first ex. He was her betrothed. And they're treasure hunting. Or, Xena's ex is treasure hunting, and Xena and Gab are Ambrosia hunting. And I have to say I absolutely love all the character interaction in this episode. It's really, really wonderful. We haven't had a silly episode, a musical episode, a Xena-lite episode, or even Joxer yet, but this, this stuff is my favorite part of the Xena series.

He said they were very young - I figure they must have been very very young, because if ten years ago as of season two Xena had a pirate ship, she must be, oh, 28-29ish when the series starts to have been 17-18 on her ship. I think she was 19-20 when her son was born, so that would fit. And Petricles was way before Ceasar, so... yeah, they were pretty young.

And Xena's angry. They were going to get married and he said himself that he lost interest in her once he caught her - basically, he did what Gabrielle considered impossible, he "caught" Xena. Cause they were young and she didn't know any better, and apparently, he didn't know any better cause he tossed her out and regretted it enough to carry around her wedding bracelet ten-twelve years later. He behaves pretty admirably in the episode but Xena tells Gab to watch out, he's a manipulative liar, because that's what she remembers him as.

In the end he dies, and before he hears Xena say he was a good man after all, too. So the door is completely closed on Xena's first love, and flung wide open on Gabrielle's, because Perdicus is around somewhere and has forgiven her for up and leaving and has grown a backbone and desires of his own besides, thus making him more attractive to her than he was back in Potedeia.

15. Warrior... Princess

It's a Xena's double episode! The very first (but certainly not the last!)

I giggled a lot. Xena wearing a pink dress? Almost putting said pink dress on backwards? (Xena's underwear makes another appearance) Xena using the harp as a quadruple-bow-string? The whole thing was very funny but not so utterly silly it could be completely disregarded. The funny episodes are my second-favorite thing about the Xena series - I love a serious show that doesn't take itself too seriously!

16. Mortal Beloved

Okay, so, first off, score another point on the Xena's-part-god card - regular mortals do NOT just stroll on into Tartarus with the intention of strolling right back on out.

And what is this outfit she's wearing? A water-dress? Swimming clothes? Xena wears a swimdress but swims with boots on? I mean, clearly she can't go swimming in her armor, and I guess she doesn't want to hang around Tartarus in her underwear, but... huh.

I have to say, the Harpies reminded me of the Wicked Witch's winged monkeys, and, btw, Xena carries a flask around so that she can breathe fire even when she's not at a banquet or in a tavern?

So, Xena loved Marcus back when she was evil, and once she was good she wasn't sure she could trust him so she tried to make him think she was still evil, but then it turned out that he tried to turn good too but it didn't work out for him, and then he died.

So... he didn't betray her like Pericles or Ceasar, and he wasn't just a random lay for her, like that warlord Draco most likely was.

I firmly believe you can love many people in your lifetime - and where does Xena and Marcus fit in with the Giving Tree kind of love? Who was destroyed? He was, I guess, but it didn't have anything to do with his love for her. So... does that mean it was the real deal? Or, does it mean that it wasn't real at all? Xena seemed to interact with him as if he were a beloved companion, not her one and only soul mate or anything, but someone she cared deeply for and thought about a lot after his death.